Rituals

Mother’s Day – How Will You Celebrate It?
Remembering Previous Mother’s Day In the past for Mother’s Day, I would drive over and pick up mum.  We would then have lunch and chat up a storm.  When the conversation began to repeat we would get back into the car and drive to visit a nursery on the outskirts of town to buy plants and fun […]

Remembering Previous Mother’s Day

In the past for Mother’s Day, I would drive over and pick up mum.  We would then have lunch and chat up a storm.  When the conversation began to repeat we would get back into the car and drive to visit a nursery on the outskirts of town to buy plants and fun things for the garden.  I would treat her and buy her favorite flowers for her window boxes and balcony pots.  Mum, in turn, would buy me something special for my garden.

We had carried out this ritual for years until I discovered mum’s memory wasn’t as good as it once was.  I began to notice that she would become agitated and combative when we went out for lunch.  So, I decided to cut out lunch with a suggestion that we celebrate Mother’s Day when the weather became warmer.  That worked well, we would still go to the nursery and then I’d bring her home for a cuppa tea.  Mum loved her garden and had always enjoyed pottering around.  It was no surprise when they moved to an apartment, flower pots and planters were installed immediately on their balcony.  It was lovely to see the enjoyment this activity gave her right up until she died.

Three Years Later after Mum’s Death

It has now been 3 years since this ritual of ours ended and now I often think of those special times spent together.  The first few years were rather hard and certainly rather teary but this year, although sad it is with fond memories as I plan to purchase a planter of pansies to take to where she is buried.  I will spend a few moments in quiet reflection as I sort the pot out and place it where I believe she’d approve.  I’m certain I will sense her smiling and looking down.  Grateful that I still remembered.

Never too old Adult Orphans still feel the Loss of Mom’s

Are you an orphaned adult like myself?  Then you will relate.  Regardless how old you are when mom’s death occurs.  You never feel old enough or prepared enough to cope with life without that important person in your life. Perhaps your mom is ill and you are now her caregiver and you have scaled back on Mother’s Day.  You may even be planning to forget about the day because for you it is too painful.  Whatever is in your heart to do, know it is right for you and do it anyway – however, whatever it is, do it guilt free.  Your heart will heal if you allow and the memories of Mom will bring you joy instead of heartache.  If you struggle with your grief, or you feel you aren’t able to move on, please connect with me

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